I am a man, right?

FB_IMG_1450943847136   I told her, “I’m a grown ass man.” Her reply was a simple stare before she turned and walked away. Before she reached the door, she turned around and said, “You really need to look in the mirror.” Then, she was gone.

I gaze into my eyes in the mirror. Who am I? Really? I am a man, right? I’ve heard it said that the eyes are the window to the soul. Is that true for the soulless? “But, I do have a soul,” I say trying to convince myself.

What do I see? What am I seeing? A man struggling emotionally and financially to raise his son. How can I raise him to be a man when I question my own manhood? What lessons am I teaching him in not being able to even provide for myself, and while complaining that his mother isn’t financially helping me?

 I chose not to work to pursue writing music, yet I’m not really working on my music. Not one song is complete. I always have a reason.

 Am I really a man when I look to a woman to grab my hand and lift me out of the hole I dug for myself and jumped into? Am I really a man when I criticize her by saying she’s acting like a man when I put her in that position? Exactly who am I? What type a person am I?

I listen only with the intent to respond and not to understand what is being said. I verbally lash out and expect to be treated and spoken to with respect and out of love. What kind of person am I who takes without regard to giving except when it benefits me?

Am I that person? My mouth says, “No.” The eyes looking back at me in the mirror say, “Yes.” “I am a man, right?” My mouths says, “Yes.” The eyes looking back at me in the mirror say, “No.”

I’d love to read your thoughts on the above article. You can leave your comments below. Thank you.

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I journeyed from GED to a PhD in Psychology. I decided to focus on my writing once I retired from the clinical field. I write in various genres and have several WIPs for publication once edited. I post articles on this website for intellectual and entertainment purposes.

0 thoughts on “I am a man, right?”

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