Frustration with Potential Clients

Frustration with Potential Clients

I have a screening process for potential clients and also a Consent Checklist for them to complete, if it gets that far. Why wouldn’t someone who contacts me for a service end up being an actual client? I’m glad you asked.

Sometimes a person:

  • May do more research after contacting me and realize I don’t offer the exact services they’re desiring.
  • May learn that I don’t accept everyone simply because they ask me for a service.
  • May not understand that a Dominatrix isn’t the same as an Escort and are disappointed to learn I don’t provide certain services.
  • May not want to answer my questions, which is my attempt to learn who they are as a person since sessions are conducted in a private space.
  • May not want to schedule to meet me ahead of time in a public place, preferring to simply want to arrive for a session.
  • May not want to delay their gratification; meaning they don’t want to give me advanced notice of meeting or scheduling an appointment even though it’s listed on my page that it’s required.
  • May not want to submit a deposit; which does actually reduce no-shows and last-minute cancellations.
  • May not realize I’m an actual person, with feelings, and not a fetish dispenser. I’m more of a fetish explorer; someone who helps clients explore their fetishes as long as it’s something I also actually enjoy and want to do.
  • May not want to complete the Consent Checklist.

All of those things are reasonable and I don’t have a problem with them. It’s helps me weed out those who would likely not be good clients for me. It’s important for me to actually like the client as a person and genuinely enjoy their company.

What frustrates me are the potential clients who think because they’re paying for a service, I owe them something more than what we negotiate. An example would be a person who insists I do something I don’t offer on the Consent Checklist. They may continue repeating they want Escort-type services. This frustrates me because if this person went to a shoe store, they choose from what’s available and make a purchase, or simply leave and go elsewhere. They wouldn’t repeatedly tell the owner or manager they wanted such-and-such that wasn’t offered at the store.

Another source of frustration is pricing. Yes, pricing is based on location. An area with a low cost of living will have less expensive prices than somewhere with a high cost of living. Some clients attempt to negotiate price with me, which also weeds them out. I sometimes ask this person when they go to a restaurant, a doctor’s appointment, to get a haircut, have the oil changed in their car or purchase new tires, if they attempt to negotiate price. The answer is always, “No.” So, why try it with me? I think it’s because we do meet in public first, they sometimes do view me as a person, and they forget what we’re discussing in a business transaction. A friendly transaction, but business nonetheless.

Though I feel frustrated, I actually don’t mind when clients seek something I don’t offer, have entitlement attitudes, attempt to negotiate price, or don’t want to complete my screening process. It actually saves me time in the long-run and frees me up to work with clients who respect me as a person and respect what I do.

The clients who do complete my screening process and follow instructions end up being very pleasant to work with. Due to the Consent Checklist, we have several things to choose from for each session which gives the client something to look forward to. Most end up being repeat clients and we do develop a nice working friendly business relationship.

I look forward to reading your thoughts and experiences regarding potential clients’ behaviors and attitudes. Have you encountered similar situations as written above? If so, how did you handle it?  

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I journeyed from GED to a PhD in Psychology. I decided to focus on my writing once I retired from the clinical field. I write in various genres and have several WIPs for publication once edited. I post articles on this website for intellectual and entertainment purposes.

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