One of Raymond’s texts was him telling me I need to talk to a local guy since I want to go on dates and actually spend quality time with someone. He said again he’d stop texting and calling me if I wanted him to. Never mind that I had already blocked his number and his calls weren’t coming through. I was only receiving his voicemails.
I later thought about why a guy (or girl) will tell a possible love interest to go find a person that does this or that, someone who makes more money than they do, a person who lives in a nicer house than they do and on and on. The answer I came up with is that deep down they know they are not able to give you what you want.
It’s irrelevant to them that you’re talking to them, spending time with them, dating them because they’re insecure with their place in your life. All the things they tell you to go find is their way of pushing you away. So, when the friendship/relationship is over they can tell themselves that it was their idea, which is a lie. Yes, it’s a lie because you liked the person and wanted things to work out. They were too foolish and insecure to see that. You finally call it quits when you get tired of dealing with their defeatist attitude. What they’ve done without realizing it was fulfill their own prophecy, one they’ve made up in their mind.
It would be beneficial for an insecure person to realize they’re that way, take a step back and evaluate the situation, acknowledge that they’re making the situation worse, and work on being the best they can be and not push the other person away with a negative attitude. An insecure person lashes out not understanding their problem is internal.
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