From the very moment we met … wait , let me be honest … from within five minutes of when we first met … it felt as if we were old friends who’d drifted apart, stumbled across each other, and sat down to catch up on what had changed since the last time we’d been in touch.
The conversation flowed, honesty was apparent, neither of us put on airs attempting to impress the other. The term “kindred spirits” came to mind. We finished each other’s sentences and shared a lot about our lives.
You called it chemistry and said you’ve never met a person as straight-forward without a filter before; a person open to discuss anything without shame. You said I was refreshing to talk to and comfortable to be around.
Whether we watched TV or sat on the balcony, somehow your fingers found their way to my arm or your arm encircled my shoulder; your face nuzzled against my neck as you embraced me. It was easy to lose myself in your touch. The sexual chemistry was undeniable, though it was more than that. We could cuddle for hours; all touches platonic. And, then there were days we’d lose all inhibitions.
Having said all of that … it’s not being in love. Or is it?
You said from the moment you saw me you were “taken” by me and knew we’d become friends. I was in a whirlwind that day and saw you as a regular man. We chatted and met again another day. You shared some of your burdens as well as aspirations and I felt my heart break for you. I had an intensely overwhelming desire to do whatever I could to lighten your load.
I wanted you to be happy. I believe happiness comes from within and so I knew I couldn’t “make” you happy. Albeit I knew I could, I hoped to, I desired to, bring lighter moments into your life causing your heart to smile. We became an “ear” to each other and provided a safe place for exchanging our innermost thoughts, pains, and hope for the future.
We unintentionally challenged each other to analyze our thoughts and feelings, acknowledge our faults, be accountable for our actions and attitudes and grow from it all. We recognized the tiniest gestures of encouragement and were appreciative. We poured into each other’s lives which left us both full of gratitude and replenishment. We gave 100% to each other which kept us both filled and wanting to give even more. There wasn’t sexual chemistry per se. Having given each other everything psychologically (mentally) and intellectually, the sexual aspect found its own way.
Having said all of that … it’s being in love. Or is it?
Can you see the difference? How would you define “love?” How would you define being “in love?” Do you think there really is a difference? I look forward to reading your thoughts.
